Comments for Debt Free Marriage http://www.debtfreemarriage.org "Helping Married Couples solve their money issues with a partnership focus." Sun, 06 Nov 2011 14:28:19 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 Comment on Did You Spend too Much for Christmas? by Jessie Z http://www.debtfreemarriage.org/did-you-spend-too-much-for-christmas#comment-1110 Jessie Z Sun, 06 Nov 2011 14:28:19 +0000 http://www.debtfreemarriage.org/?p=175#comment-1110 Thank you for this. Here is how I miss all the frenzy of Black Friday - I work in retail, and I have to SELL you the stuff you want to buy. By the time my shift ends, I have been way to busy to buy the deals I wanted, or the things I wanted or "needed" to take advantage of are all gone. Thats the easiest way for me to save!! :) Thank you for this. Here is how I miss all the frenzy of Black Friday – I work in retail, and I have to SELL you the stuff you want to buy. By the time my shift ends, I have been way to busy to buy the deals I wanted, or the things I wanted or “needed” to take advantage of are all gone. Thats the easiest way for me to save!! :)

]]> Comment on Combo Conflict by David Bibby http://www.debtfreemarriage.org/combo-conflict#comment-1038 David Bibby Thu, 13 Oct 2011 18:43:21 +0000 http://debtfreemarriage.wordpress.com/?p=24#comment-1038 Tami, Thanks for your question. You and your husband must absolutely get on the same page financially. The only way that can happen is to spend your money on paper first... When he gets paid again... write down his paycheck on the top line... then start subtracting all the things you need. For example: Paycheck + $1200 -$120 emergency fund savings -$ 200 electric -$ 85 water -$ 300 food and toiletries Make sure that your bases are covered first.. House, Food, Utilities, and Transportation. then continue to spend the rest on paper until there is $0 left. Then both of you sign it.... and LIVE BY IT. Do this EVERY PAYCHECK. For more information.. Read "Financial Peace" by Dave Ramsey... and if you have massive debt, read "The Total Money Makeover" If your husband is not going to agree to this... then you may have other choices to make... such as opening up your own account in your name only... and insist that X amount goes there. I'm sure he feels bad for the fees and I hope he learns that spending money with out a budget hurts everyone. Tami,

Thanks for your question. You and your husband must absolutely get on the same page financially. The only way that can happen is to spend your money on paper first…

When he gets paid again… write down his paycheck on the top line… then start subtracting all the things you need. For example:

Paycheck + $1200
-$120 emergency fund savings
-$ 200 electric
-$ 85 water
-$ 300 food and toiletries

Make sure that your bases are covered first.. House, Food, Utilities, and Transportation.

then continue to spend the rest on paper until there is $0 left.

Then both of you sign it…. and LIVE BY IT. Do this EVERY PAYCHECK.

For more information.. Read “Financial Peace” by Dave Ramsey… and if you have massive debt, read “The Total Money Makeover”

If your husband is not going to agree to this… then you may have other choices to make… such as opening up your own account in your name only… and insist that X amount goes there. I’m sure he feels bad for the fees and I hope he learns that spending money with out a budget hurts everyone.

]]> Comment on Combo Conflict by Tami J http://www.debtfreemarriage.org/combo-conflict#comment-1031 Tami J Wed, 12 Oct 2011 04:24:12 +0000 http://debtfreemarriage.wordpress.com/?p=24#comment-1031 UGH...He is a spender with no regard and I am a saver who stresses easily with no money. We have tried talking about it but it ends up in a yelling match most of time, we have tried budgeting only to have it ruined by job loss. We now have a new job, more bills, twins that were born, and still have a spender and a saver with no light at the end of the tunnel (so it seems). An example of what happened We decided that with him working and me staying home to watch the 4 kids that $80 a week is what we could maybe afford for gas and his ciggarettes. He got half a tank of gas got his ciggarettes then did who knows what with the rest of the money (he may have spent it all I don't know). Then 2 days later says he needs more money for gas. Then when I go to check our bank account find out that he spent an extra $55(before bank fees) and then tells me he needs money for gas or he will not be able to go to work. With the bank fees at $33 a transaction the 55 (5 transactions) ends up being $220.00 that we are now in the hole. We have tried cash only with him, but then he just goes to the bank and takes out money, then when checks cash we are negative again and so on and so on. I am at my wits end. We have been through this since we got married and now with 2 more kids added to the family this year and me not working (because of daycare costs) we can not afford for this to happen. So my question is Do I give him the money or what do I do next? UGH…He is a spender with no regard and I am a saver who stresses easily with no money. We have tried talking about it but it ends up in a yelling match most of time, we have tried budgeting only to have it ruined by job loss. We now have a new job, more bills, twins that were born, and still have a spender and a saver with no light at the end of the tunnel (so it seems). An example of what happened

We decided that with him working and me staying home to watch the 4 kids that $80 a week is what we could maybe afford for gas and his ciggarettes. He got half a tank of gas got his ciggarettes then did who knows what with the rest of the money (he may have spent it all I don’t know). Then 2 days later says he needs more money for gas. Then when I go to check our bank account find out that he spent an extra $55(before bank fees) and then tells me he needs money for gas or he will not be able to go to work. With the bank fees at $33 a transaction the 55 (5 transactions) ends up being $220.00 that we are now in the hole. We have tried cash only with him, but then he just goes to the bank and takes out money, then when checks cash we are negative again and so on and so on. I am at my wits end.

We have been through this since we got married and now with 2 more kids added to the family this year and me not working (because of daycare costs) we can not afford for this to happen. So my question is Do I give him the money or what do I do next?

]]> Comment on Combo Conflict by David Bibby http://www.debtfreemarriage.org/combo-conflict#comment-996 David Bibby Wed, 05 Oct 2011 20:16:21 +0000 http://debtfreemarriage.wordpress.com/?p=24#comment-996 This is a big issue. If he is doing all the budgeting and you come in and second guess him... then he gets upset with you. If you don't come and ask questions then he's more liable to overspend in some areas and you get upset with HIM!. I agree it's complicated. The best thing I've found is to spend all your money ON PAPER first. If you're getting paid $1200 this week...write down everything that you plan to do with is until there is 0 left. Ask your husband to make changes to it and see if you can both agree before you even get paid. When you finally do get your check...execute your plans! I'll admit this is easier said than done... but with practice... you can still be in control of the money, but your husband is involved with the decisions. Later... when you feel up to it.. ask your husband to prepare the budget on paper and have him start paying the bills as you execute your plans. Hope this helps.. David This is a big issue. If he is doing all the budgeting and you come in and second guess him… then he gets upset with you. If you don’t come and ask questions then he’s more liable to overspend in some areas and you get upset with HIM!. I agree it’s complicated. The best thing I’ve found is to spend all your money ON PAPER first. If you’re getting paid $1200 this week…write down everything that you plan to do with is until there is 0 left. Ask your husband to make changes to it and see if you can both agree before you even get paid. When you finally do get your check…execute your plans!

I’ll admit this is easier said than done… but with practice… you can still be in control of the money, but your husband is involved with the decisions. Later… when you feel up to it.. ask your husband to prepare the budget on paper and have him start paying the bills as you execute your plans.

Hope this helps..
David

]]> Comment on Combo Conflict by Jennifer Maddron http://www.debtfreemarriage.org/combo-conflict#comment-992 Jennifer Maddron Wed, 05 Oct 2011 11:03:37 +0000 http://debtfreemarriage.wordpress.com/?p=24#comment-992 Oh, I know this scenario fairly well. My husband has had a spending issue for as long as I've known him. We're still working on it, but what it ended up coming down to was me taking full control of the finances. I hate it! Not only do I not want yet another thing to worry about, but I feel as though he isn't going to learn this way. On the other hand, we've been in quite a few pickles when hubby thought that he was doing better with his spending issue and would relax. So, I feel like I can't trust him. Still working to resolve the issue, but until then it's up to me. Oh, I know this scenario fairly well. My husband has had a spending issue for as long as I’ve known him. We’re still working on it, but what it ended up coming down to was me taking full control of the finances. I hate it! Not only do I not want yet another thing to worry about, but I feel as though he isn’t going to learn this way. On the other hand, we’ve been in quite a few pickles when hubby thought that he was doing better with his spending issue and would relax. So, I feel like I can’t trust him. Still working to resolve the issue, but until then it’s up to me.

]]> Comment on Husband, Your Wife Needs Financial Stability. by Just Me http://www.debtfreemarriage.org/husband-your-wife-needs-financial-stability#comment-969 Just Me Sun, 02 Oct 2011 03:15:53 +0000 http://www.debtfreemarriage.org/?p=145#comment-969 Well we have enough to pay our bills only nothing above. Food is purchased on credit. Please pray for us. Well we have enough to pay our bills only nothing above. Food is purchased on credit. Please pray for us.

]]> Comment on Husband, Your Wife Needs Financial Stability. by David Bibby http://www.debtfreemarriage.org/husband-your-wife-needs-financial-stability#comment-962 David Bibby Sat, 01 Oct 2011 12:57:19 +0000 http://www.debtfreemarriage.org/?p=145#comment-962 Just Me, I know this is a huge betrayal. You value being debt free and he may claim too, but then his actions speak otherwise. Here are some resources for you to look into. 1. To learn about couponing, go to <a href="www.moneycrashers.com/coupons-from-casual-to-extreme" rel="nofollow">www.moneycrashers.com/coupons-from-casual-to-extreme</a> , <a href="http://www.couponfedfamily.com" rel="nofollow">www.couponfedfamily.com</a> , <a href="http://www.howtoshopforfree.net" rel="nofollow">www.howtoshopforfree.net</a> 2. I would also recommend reading <a href="http://www.amazon.com/s?ie=UTF8&x=0&ref_=nb_sb_ss_c_1_10&y=0&field-keywords=total%20money%20makeover&url=search-alias%3Dstripbooks&sprefix=total%20mone&_encoding=UTF8&tag=wwwdebtfreema-20&linkCode=ur2&camp=1789&creative=390957" rel="nofollow">Dave Ramsey's "The Total Money Makeover"</a> You and your husband will now have to get on the same page financially. Is there anything else that he's spending money on that you don't know about? Do the two of you make enough or are you spending to much today? Just Me,

I know this is a huge betrayal. You value being debt free and he may claim too, but then his actions speak otherwise. Here are some resources for you to look into.

1. To learn about couponing, go to http://www.moneycrashers.com/coupons-from-casual-to-extreme , http://www.couponfedfamily.com , http://www.howtoshopforfree.net

2. I would also recommend reading Dave Ramsey’s “The Total Money Makeover”

You and your husband will now have to get on the same page financially. Is there anything else that he’s spending money on that you don’t know about? Do the two of you make enough or are you spending to much today?

]]> Comment on Husband, Your Wife Needs Financial Stability. by Just Me http://www.debtfreemarriage.org/husband-your-wife-needs-financial-stability#comment-959 Just Me Sat, 01 Oct 2011 05:57:04 +0000 http://www.debtfreemarriage.org/?p=145#comment-959 I need some help. I was a single parent for many years and recently got married. After years of working long hours, living frugally and aquiring no debt my world has changed greatly. I am no longer employed and my husband has a very good job. He has recently revealed that he has enormous consumer debt, which he had minimized. Everything above our monthly expenses is puchased on credit. I was not aware of this. It has been difficult for me to find employment due to our depressed economy. We need tools to get out of debt. I would like to learn how to use coupons effectively - though I have been studying it on the internet and it is very overwhelming. Please help me. I need some help. I was a single parent for many years and recently got married. After years of working long hours, living frugally and aquiring no debt my world has changed greatly. I am no longer employed and my husband has a very good job. He has recently revealed that he has enormous consumer debt, which he had minimized. Everything above our monthly expenses is puchased on credit. I was not aware of this. It has been difficult for me to find employment due to our depressed economy.

We need tools to get out of debt. I would like to learn how to use coupons effectively – though I have been studying it on the internet and it is very overwhelming.

Please help me.

]]> Comment on Managing the “Business” of Home? by David Bibby http://www.debtfreemarriage.org/managing-the-business-of-home#comment-756 David Bibby Sun, 11 Sep 2011 17:46:54 +0000 http://www.debtfreemarriage.org/?p=198#comment-756 Jeff, Thanks for the comment! I hope your website is becomes a huge success too! Jeff,

Thanks for the comment! I hope your website is becomes a huge success too!

]]> Comment on Managing the “Business” of Home? by Jeff Ehrlich http://www.debtfreemarriage.org/managing-the-business-of-home#comment-752 Jeff Ehrlich Sat, 10 Sep 2011 17:20:09 +0000 http://www.debtfreemarriage.org/?p=198#comment-752 Great article - I agree it is always better to cut expenses then increase income. If you just work on increasing income you will end up spending that also. It all comes down to getting on a zero balance budget and living within your means. Thanks, Jeff www.debtfreesquad.com Great article – I agree it is always better to cut expenses then increase income. If you just work on increasing income you will end up spending that also. It all comes down to getting on a zero balance budget and living within your means.

Thanks,

Jeff
http://www.debtfreesquad.com

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